Marrying Your Long Term Partner
Marrying Your Long Term Partner
Over the past year or so, we’ve noticed a growing number of enquiries from older couples who have been together for twenty, sometimes even thirty years or more. In many cases, neither of them has ever felt the need to get married, and they’ve built a happy, settled life together without it.
But over time, something shifts.
It might be a conversation with a friend, comments from family, or advice from a professional. Gradually, the idea of marriage or civil partnership comes up in conversation more often, and usually not for romantic reasons, but for practical and financial ones.
And so, marriage becomes a question worth considering.
By this stage in life, you may already have a home, grown-up children, perhaps even grandchildren, and a life that feels full and established. Considering your loved ones, or beneficiaries, is exactly why more older couples are contemplating planning a wedding later in life.
Practicalities for Marrying Your Long Term Partner
We’ll keep this simple, because financial matters are always best discussed with the right experts.
What many couples don’t realise is that marriage or civil partnership can offer financially practical advantages, particularly when it comes to inheritance and protecting what you’ve built together over the years.
In very simple terms, anything left to a spouse or civil partner is free from inheritance tax. For unmarried couples, that isn’t always the case.
Also, some tax allowances can be passed between spouses, making a significant difference over time. As we get older, it’s only natural that we become more mindful of these financial considerations. It’s this kind of information that prompts older couples to ask, “Should we be thinking about this now?” In today’s uncertain world, choosing to marry after many years together can feel less like a romantic gesture and more like a sensible, considered decision.
Why a big wedding might not be right
Getting married and having a wedding can be two entirely different things.
If you want to, you can take care of the legalities with a simple registry office ceremony. It can be done quietly, quickly, and without any real disruption to your day.
For some, it’s an attractive proposition, because let’s be honest, if you’ve already watched children, nieces, or nephews plan big weddings, you know how much time, energy (and cost) are involved. The idea of doing it yourselves at this stage of life is exhausting.
When your life is already filled with supporting family members and enjoying a long-awaited retirement, you can be forgiven for wanting a quiet life wherever possible!
But there’s an important point not to overlook. Staying together for decades, supporting one another through life’s ups and downs, is no small thing. It’s absolutely worth planning a moment in your lives to acknowledge such an achievement. Whilst you don’t need a lot of fuss or fanfare, a celebration that feels personal and special is what you deserve.
The whole atmosphere of our wedding day was very relaxed, friendly and full of personal touches that surpassed our expectations. Even after more than thirty years together, the team at Cote How made this a very special and happy day for us both, one that we will always remember.
Don’t Feel the Weight of Expectation
For many older couples, the idea of having a wedding at this stage of life can feel unfamiliar.
We tend to associate weddings with youthfulness and certain traditions that can make the whole idea feel slightly uncomfortable.
But one of the real advantages of getting married later in life is that you know yourselves.
You know what you enjoy, what you don’t, and what matters to you both. The self-assurance that comes with age gives you the freedom to plan a celebration that feels entirely about you and for you, without worrying about other people’s expectations.
In many ways, that’s where the real joy of getting married later in life lies.
When Love Has Already Stood the Test of Time
If the thought of a disco and a packed dance floor doesn’t appeal, you’re not alone. You’ve probably sat through enough best man speeches to last a lifetime, and most of us know how it feels to be marooned between two strangers during an endless wedding breakfast!
We’re seeing more older couples opting for quieter, more relaxed wedding celebrations, with good food, a beautiful setting, and time to enjoy the company of the people they care about.
Choosing less noise and more conversation when your relationship has already stood the test of time feels perfectly natural, and rightly so.
Re-thinking Weddings Later in Life
Rather than starting with wedding traditions, begin with a few simple questions:
Q. Who would we really like to share this with?
For some, it’s a small group of close family and friends. For others, it might simply be the two of you.
Q. What would make the day enjoyable for us?
Perhaps a relaxed, unhurried day-long celebration all in one place. Or something short and sweet at your chosen venue, followed by a special meal in a restaurant later on.
Q. Where do we want to be on our wedding day?
Is there a favourite holiday destination that holds special memories, or are you looking closer to home? Maybe you’re open to new places, if the right team are there to support you.
Q. What makes something feel like a special event to us?
Think about what would make your wedding day feel memorable. It’s less about how you want it to look and more about the atmosphere you want to create.
Small & Personal: Weddings for Later-Life Couples
The whole atmosphere of our wedding day was very relaxed, friendly and full of personal touches that surpassed our expectations.
For mature couples who have already built a life together, a smaller, more intimate wedding is a natural choice. These are the ‘must-haves’ we hear most often from our more mature wedding couples:
- A relaxed, unhurried day without strict timelines
- A smaller group of guests – your closest family and friends
- One beautiful setting, rather than moving from place to place
- A focus on excellent food and easy conversation
- Thoughtful, personal touches without the formalities
And, perhaps most importantly, the time to enjoy it all without feeling “on show.”
It’s a day we will remember and cherish always
I Still Choose You...
Getting married after a lifetime together can be a sound financial decision, one that brings greater security for you and your family.
But it’s also a decision to celebrate the life you’ve lived together this far, through all its ups and downs, and to say, ‘I still choose you, after all these years’.
Thank you
Thanks as always to our recommended photographers and our wonderful wedding couples for sharing their wedding portraits. For details about getting married in the Lake District, contact Westmorland & Furness Registry Team.
Get in touch
If you’d like to chat with us about planning your wedding day at Cote How, we’d love to hear from you! Why not get in touch using the link below:
FURTHER INFORMATION:
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