Ten reasons why an elopement wedding might be right for you
Engaged to be married but unsure what style of wedding you want? But you know you would like a relaxed stress-free wedding in an idyllic setting, where it is all about the two of you and the love you share for each other.
Traditionally when we think of eloping, we imagine a bride scrambling from her bedroom window, escaping the family home, and eloping with her sweetheart in the dead of night.
Modern elopements tend to be less about running away in secret, and more about a slimmed down wedding focused on "Just The Two Of You". Many do include a select number of close family or friends. The emphasis being on a more relaxed, informal, and private wedding perhaps in a more unusual destination wedding location.
If you are considering eloping here are 10 reasons to help you decide:
1 Simplicity - It’s more about the TWO of YOU
It’s so easy to get carried away on the ‘Wedding Train’ and lose focus of why you wanted to get married in the first place. Keeping it simple, it’s more about the love that you hold for each other, and how you want to make those life affirming commitments to each other.
Elopements, by being smaller and shorter, are more focused on the wedding ceremony itself, the sentiment behind the vows, the intimacy and privacy, rather than the party you feel you need to throw to keep your guests entertained. Designed just for yourselves… you can be selfish, indulgent, and exclusive, by not feeling obliged to anyone else.
2 You get to Choose When and Where
You may start out with ideas of a destination wedding somewhere special to the two of you, but as the wedding train gets bigger the needs of your guests become a major consideration. Are they able and willing to make the journey, how will they get there, and where they will stay. Can they get baby sitters, or time off school? This is particularly important if a mid-week wedding is an attractive option for you, as many wedding venues offer generous savings midweek in addition to often having more dates available compared to weekends, which get booked up very quickly.
Having fewer guests naturally increases your options when trying to find your perfect wedding venue, plus opting for a midweek wedding can save you waiting time and money.
You may like the idea of your wedding being a part of a bigger adventure, so with less strain on the budget you could splash out a little more to combine your destination wedding with an epic honeymoon.
3 Short on Time
Traditionally elopements were arranged in secret… There’s a lot to be said for this of course!
But if you don't want to keep it a secret, or you are not good at keeping a secret, why wait?
Short notice weddings are becoming very popular and let’s not over complicate this… The smaller and simpler the wedding then the easier it is to arrange.
You need a date, the two of you, two witnesses, and a registrar. Legal notices are required but even these can be done in 30 days or sooner if you have special circumstances and need to be married sooner.
4 Minimise the Stress
Beware the experts. It’s great to receive advice, tips, do’s & don’ts - but don’t lose sight of your original vision, your own dreams, based around your own style and budget.
You announce your engagement then suddenly everyone becomes an expert wedding planner.
Eloping eliminates the obligation often felt in trying to keep everyone appeased. It’s so easy to get caught up in the Bridezilla frenzy – does it matter if your shoes are not quite the right shade of ivory? The more you allow others to influence your thinking the higher your stress levels will be.
5 Is the size of your wedding getting out of hand?
So many times I hear from couples who have happily decided on guest lists and found a venue perfect for their needs… then for reasons outside of their control, usually financial supporters, they are pressured into accommodating guests they have never even met. I recall one very distresses bride; “I never even knew he had an Auntie Eileen!” - Distant cousins, work colleagues and plus ones, are often the topic of heated debate.A smaller guest list requires a smaller budget, less financial pressure, and possibly no need for additional funders, giving you the freedom and flexibility you need to remain in control. Do you even need a guest list at all? You can still have your cake and eat it too by eloping then organising a fun and informal party nearer home after the wedding!
6 Use your money wisely
According to the Telegraph, The Guardian and The Independent, the average cost of a UK wedding in 2017 was more than £27,000.
Think about what the important key elements to your wedding are. Maybe you could ditch the wedding favours, the wedding car, the wedding singer, the cake of many colours and flavours; the gluten free, the traditional fruit, and of course the dairy free layer, and maybe even the official wedding photographer. though there are some great photographers out there that specialise in elopement wedding photography. After all, the memories are priceless!
When the menus go out to your enormous guest list with the statutory request for any special diets, you may need to brace yourselves for the ever-growing list of food allergies and dietary intolerances that you are now obliged to accommodate.
Medical conditions are of course one thing and as such are extremely important, but you are now faced with a major operation in coordinating various fads, which on balance are not going to cause extreme upset, yet you feel obliged to accommodate. This often results in altering your preferred menu choices for other more suitable options, but not what you would really love to eat on your own wedding day.
The seating plan - the strategic placement of estranged guests is fast becoming an art form. Do you really need a top table? Do you really need to cut the cake?
Do you have to embarrass yourself with a first dance performance to please the guests?
Do you really have to stand up and make a speech?
Elopements, by definition, are for the rule breakers and those that defy tradition, so have some fun and think creatively!
9 Who are you trying to impress?
Firstly who do you upset when choosing, or rather, not choosing your bridesmaids and best man/men? How are you going to decide on outfits to suit everyone with so many different skin tones and body shapes? Not forgetting that you can’t upstage the bride.
With elopement weddings there is no need to ‘Dress to Impress’ your guests - You just need to wow yourselves and each other!
Back on the wedding train we see speeches evolving, with interactive quizzes, over-sized white screens and embarrassing slideshows more focused on the competition between university friends than appropriateness for your wedding.
10 Friends and Family Elopements
Modern elopements are not always secret runaway couples, though this is still desirable for some. You can extend your elopement wedding to include your nearest and dearest – It just means smaller, more intimate, and more focused - so instead of thinking 100, think 10. So consider smaller more intimate weddings if elopements are not quite big enough.
Read up on our Elopement and Just Us Wedding Options here